Manual Of Life- How To Live A Better Life Based on Stoic Philosophy Of Epictetus?

 

 

 

 

 

Epictetus was a Greek Stoic Philosopher. The book Enchiridion, contains discourses of Epictetus.

 

The manual contains practical advise as to how to live a stress free and a happy life.

 

These advise are easy to follow and can be applied by everyone in our daily life.

 

Don’t Fret Over What You Can Not Control

 

There are a few things in life which are in our control i.e. our opinion, mood, feelings, desires, aversions etc. And there are things over which we do not have any control over i.e. other people’s opinion of you, criticism, circumstances, weather etc

 

It is essential that we have clear understanding of what is in our control and what is not. The things which are in our control, we can do something about.

 

However, the things which are not in our control, there is no point losing our sleep over it.

 

For example someone spoke ill about you and insulted you in-front of others. You have no control over other person’s slight remarks, so don’t feel offended and get angry. By becoming angry or feeling angry the situation will not get any better, rather it will further deteriorate. However, you have control over how you perceive his remarks and how you respond to it.

 

So focus your energies on what you can control, and not what are out side the sphere of your control.

 

Next time when you face any unpleasant situation, do as suggested by Epictetus, ask yourself, “Is this something that is, or is not, in my control?” and if it is not the thing you control then say to yourself, “Then it is none of my concern.”

 

This will set your perspective right and stop you from wasting your energy, time on things which are beyond your control.

 

“ If you would be free, then do not wish to have, or avoid, things that other people control, because then you must serve as their slave.”..Epictetus

 

 

We Create Our State of Mind

 

We tend to blame external factors/events for our miseries. However, it is not the events or things which causes us grief, rather our judgement of it.

 

We should be mind-full of the meaning or judgement we ascribe to the events for it will decide whether we will flourish or perish.

 

So whenever, you are happy, sad, frustrated hold yourself responsible for it.

 

When you make yourself responsible for your current state of mind then it is in your control to change it.

 

Mediocre people blame others for their misfortune however successful people take accountability for their fortune or misfortune.

 

Cultivate a success mindset and take responsibility for whatever happens to you in life.

 

All Power if Within You

 

“For every challenge, remember the resources you have within you to cope with it. Provoked by the sight of a handsome man or a beautiful woman, you will discover within you the contrary power of self-restraint. Faced with pain, you will discover the power of endurance. If you are insulted, you will discover the power of patience. In time, you will grow to be confident that there is no single impression that you will not have the moral means to tolerate”...Epictetus

 

The store house of power in within us. The treasure we seek outside, lay hidden inside us. But due to ignorance we keep looking outside of us like a Deer searching for Musk which is hidden in it.

 

All resources that you need to succeed or overcome an adversity is within you.  You have all the power within you to stop you falling prey to temptations or seductions.

 

All endurance needed to bear pain is within you.  The more you tap into your hidden treasures, more confident you shall become to face any challenges on your own, in life.

 

Stop Sweating The Small Stuff

 

Stop sweating the small stuff if you want to live a happy and contented life.

 

Don’t get stressed whether you’ll get fired from your job, for it is not in your control or I must teach a lesson to the person who insulted you etc.

 

It is better to live a pauper’s life free of sorrow, pain and fear than to live an affluent life full of pain, sorrow and grief.

Nothing on this earth is worth losing your mind over.

 

Focus On Self

 

Don’t worry too much about the people who have more name, fame, riches than you. Don’t assume they are happier than you or better than you.

 

You do not need external validation to prove your self-worth. If you are comparing yourself with others and seek outside approval you shall have a very troubled life.

If you want to be free, focus within (on self) than without or other people or external factors which are beyond your control.

 

Be accountable to yourself and that will set you free

 

“ If you are ever tempted to look for outside approval, realize that you have compromised your integrity.”..Epictetus

 

Attachment Is The Root Cause of Misery

 

Attachment to things or person is the root cause of misery in life. Remind yourself of the things you have become attached to- car, house, gadgets, spouse, kids etc.

 

Learn to be detached from these sources of attachments. Remind yourself often that at the end all things perish, you shall not be able to have possession over it indefinitely.

 

 

Start practicing detachment on daily basis. Start with smaller things. Do as Epictetus suggested:

 

If it is china you like, for instance, say,” I am fond of a piece of china.” When it breaks, then you won’t be disconcerted. When giving your wife or child a kiss, repeat you yourself, “ I am kissing a mortal.” Then you won’t be so distraught if they are taken from you.. Epictetus

 

 

Rehearse Your Plans

 

Whenever you are planning an action mentally rehearse it in detail.

 

If you are going for an important sales meeting, visualize how you will make the pitch, what questions the client may ask you. Be ready with the answers to the questions.

 

Also, visualize how you will respond if the other person becomes unreasonable with you. Since you have rehearsed it you shall be able to deal with the situation in a dignified manner.

 

You Are Not Your Possessions

 

People are proud of their possessions:

the latest car

smart phone or

expensive watch etc.

 

It is futile to be proud of something which is not you.

 

If the car is beautiful, does that quality belongs to you.  So don’t put your self- worth on the things which are not you.

 

Don’t be proud of things which are fleeting, temporary in nature. Your strength, beauty, youth all will fade away one day.

 

Mohd Ali, one of the greatest boxer of all time, suffered from Parkinson disease in the later stage of his life. His famed agility, power, speed was all gone, which was not him.

However, his inner beauty continued to shine beyond his boxing days by way of touching people’s life with his philanthropic work.

 

Be proud of your character, courage, values which will never leave or forsake you till death and beyond.

 

What Is The Path To Peace?

 

Don’t hope the events will turn out the way you want; rather accept them as they are.

 

Don’t resist the unpleasant events or feelings, just accept them without ascribing any meaning to it.

 

Our subconscious resists whatever it finds unfamiliar, against the perceived deep rooted behaviour patterns or values or the perceptions that have been formed due to our faulty thought pattern.

 

To overcome resistance, be like water. Accept whatever life throws at you. When you accept, there is no resistance. When there is no resistance you can look at things objectively without being clouded with emotions.

 

Don’t Handover The Switch of Your Emotions To Others

 

“ If your body was turned over to just anyone, you would doubtless take exception. Why aren’t you ashamed that you have made your mind vulnerable to anyone who happens to criticize you, so that it automatically becomes confused and upset?”..Epictetus

 

This is one of the most empowering thoughts

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No sane human being will ever think in his wildest dream to give up one’s right on his or her body. It is similar to being a salve to someone else.

 

But at the same time we do not hesitate to hand over reigns of our mind and emotions to others and feel insulted, bad, humiliated when they do, say something unpleasant.

 

When you get upset over external factors you relinquish control over your mind and emotions and become slave to words or thoughts or views of other people.

 

This is the worst form of slavery which we are not even aware of.

 

When you are body is enslaved you still have inner freedom, to choose how you want to feel and behave in any given situation.

 

This inner freedom to choose one’s response to any circumstance at one’s one terms is key to liberation.

 

But when your mind is enslaved you do not have any inner freedom, your responses, emotions etc are controlled and dictated by people outside of you.

 

It is like handing over the switch of your mind/emotions to someone else. They can control you by flipping the switch as and when they want.

 

Don’t handover the switch of your emotions to others.

 

Preserve Your Character

 

Preserve your character as you would your body from harmful objects.

 

In today’s world there are so many temptations all around us which test our resolve to maintain our character.

 

Have values and morals to live your life with. Whenever you perform any action or take any decision these values will be your moral compass to help you to take action/decision congruent to your character.

 

Any wound to your body can heal but character once wounded is difficult to heal.

 

Don’t Judge the Letter By its Envelop

 

We tend to judge people by their actions and label them good, bad or ugly based on our map of the world.

 

If someone drinks you may call him an alcoholic or someone lied you may call him a liar.

 

Don’t label people until you know the reason behind their actions. Moreover, people are more than their actions or habits.

 

 

Every person operates at a different wavelength. He may have a world view which is different from yours, which does not make is a bad person.

 

Hence, don’t judge people, separate his actions from his individuality. This will help you in living a stress free life and build better relationship with others.